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When your partner starts acting weird and all all of a sudden, and you start to suffer in your relationship die to this act, its best you ask yourself what you are doing wrong. We women can feel a shift in our partners energy and it instinctively makes us feel worried, anxious and insecure no matter how much we want to appear cool and confident. He was doing and saying all the right things and everything to make you feel so happy. In fact, it has the opposite effect on him!


5 ways to stop a man from withdrawing

After many years, and dancing around the edges, my best friend and I have fallen for each other. We recently confessed our feelings, and are now together.

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He knows this. Very recently during sex, he has started pulling out to ejaculate.

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I take oral contraceptives. We had sex a handful of times before our relationship, and it was not an issue then. He says he loves me. You are right to judge this transition as delicate; tread carefully, and try not to take his withdrawal personally.

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Even though withdrawing is not a secure method of contraception, try to reframe his doing so as his way of protecting your relationship, or warding off what he may see as disaster for both of you. Talk with him gently, seeking to understand his true feelings — and express yours.

Also, examine your own feelings when he withholds his ejaculate — clearly, you feel distrusted, but do you also feel rejected?

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Help him to understand and, hopefully, empathise. By the way, if you are hoping to have children at some point — and feel you need to do so at a biologically optimum time — it is essential to have that conversation pretty soon — in a frank and non-punitive manner. Pamela Stephenson Connolly is a US-based psychotherapist who specialises in treating sexual disorders.

1. calm down and realize that him pulling away is a totally natural thing

If you would like advice from Pamela on sexual matters, send us a brief description of your concerns to private. Each week, Pamela chooses one problem to answer, which will be published online and in print.

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She regrets that she cannot enter into personal correspondence. Submissions are subject to our terms and conditions: see gu. Comments on this piece are premoderated to ensure discussion remains on topics raised by the writer.

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Please be aware there may be a short delay in comments appearing on the site. Sexual healing Relationships.

3 steps to stop a man from withdrawing

My partner has started withdrawing before ejaculation — why? Pamela Stephenson Connolly.

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Mon 28 Jan Topics Relationships Sexual healing features. Reuse this content.

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Why do guys come on so strong at first and then pull away?


When a man starts to withdraw or pull away, a lot of women reflexively panic and try to do whatever they can to reel him back in.


You can always tell when a man starts needing space in a relationship.


You put on your favorite do-me red lipstick and your sexiest lingerie and walked into the living room to surprise him and he told you that he was tired and just wanted to watch the game.