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In the beginning, it's exciting. You can't wait to see your BF or GF — and it feels amazing to know that he or she feels the same way. The happiness and excitement of a new relationship can overpower everything else. Nothing stays new forever, though. Things change as couples get to know each other better.


There can be serious weight to that consideration, too. A good breakup can mean a guilt-free next few months for you, and maybe even friendship with the ex over time; a bad one can have all kinds of unexpected negative consequences, for you, for your ex, and for your mutual friends.

How to break up with someone you love

Unsure how to get it right? Frame it as a chemistry issue, rather than there being anything wrong about them. Once a relationship has progressed into the one- or two-month territory, the breakup rules change as a result. By now, you know much more about each other; have probably shared more intimate moments, and may have met friends or family, whether digitally or in person.

More on this topic

Tessina, Ph. Romance's Guide to Finding Love Today. If you have to see each other because of work or mutual friends, be distant but cordial.

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Like Barrett, for a slightly longer relationship, she recommends breaking up with something along the lines of. Break up by text or message, then block the other person. That in and of itself can feel like a cause for breaking up for some people. Chris Donaghue. Closer to three months and you can be a bit more vague, while closer to 11 months means you should probably be more specific and expect more of a discussion. She suggested phrases like this:.

The five-step guide to breaking up with someone you're seeing

I don't think it's going to work out between us. It's not fair to you to continue with something I'm not sure about. At this stage of a relationship, a breakup should definitely not be taken lightly, according to sex and relationship therapist Janet Brito.

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The goal is to stay focused on expressing your feelings without being attacking or accusatory. And afterwards? The more serious the relationship, the more your ex deserves an explanation.

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At this length, you should expect to potentially have a lengthy conversation where they ask you questions, rather than simply you delivering a message. If you find yourself rambling, convincing your ex of your reasons, or debating the pros and cons of breaking up, you are likely discussing unnecessary details. Moving in together with a partner is something few people do lightly. That also means you should try to make it a swift rather than drawn-out process, according to Dr. Susan Ansorge, psychologist and medical advisor to Giddy. While it might be preferable to obscure the truth a little bit in less serious breakups, here, you really owe the other person a clear understanding of what went wrong.

Perhaps you say something like. But what about animals, you ask?

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Is there someone you can stay with, do you have access to another house or apartment, or do you have the resources to stay at a hotel or motel for a while? Search AskMen Search. Messages You have no messages.

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Several years back, I found myself grappling with a rather common conundrum.


Sure, some people have - gasp!


Relationships aren't always black and white.